CAKE DAD: gay little flowers

Hi Gay!

It’s pride mnth here at Violet Bakehouse (just kidding, it’s always pride month here¹). I hope that you’re staying cool and hydrated. I'm doing a lot of last minute planning to try to get some fun trips in this summer. I’ve been able to make a lot of really fun cakes lately and I’m so grateful for all of the folks that just let me run wild.

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I get called Violet a lot. Like all the time actually. I totally love it though. Sometimes I don’t correct people. ***** But also like, if my business was called “Lauren’s Bakehouse”-  like what. 

The name comes, in part, from my paternal Great-Aunt Violet. Whom I never met but my Dad gets all smiley when he talks about her. And also, from the long history of violets as a sort of sapphic-flagging symbol. Purple is my favourite colour and also the gayest colour. 

In April, I attended the Queer Food Conference at Boston University. It made me understand ComicCon, and the buzzing passion between LARPers. I was with my people. Nerds! Every one of us. I learned about the radical potential of queer food media, queer-coded food television, and fake food in house museums in the southern US(!!). 

 When I think of queer food I think of nourishing granolas, jams and tea. I think of the nourishing comfort food of lesbian and feminist restaurants and the ferments of Sandor Katz.  I think about how interwoven queerness is with nature and flowers. I think of consuming flowers and making things that are just that extra bit beautiful. I was asked to contribute a recipe to the upcoming Queer Food Anthology and researching for it sent me on a spiral through the connection between queerness and flowers. Lord(e), knows I love to research so here’s a little history of some of the flowers most associated with queerness throughout history.

P.S. All of the flowers explored below are safe to eat (if grown without pesticides!).

Violets

The poet Sappho from the island of Lesbos in Greece (c. 600 BCE) was so iconic that we 

get two terms from her.  The term Lesbian from her island and “sapphic” love describes WLW (women love women) relationships. Sappho is known for her achingly beautiful poetry of which we have only fragments. I really recommend reading Ann Carson’s translations, If Not, Winter if you want to pine by the beach this summer. Sappho often wrote of purple blooms and violet crowns.

Fragment 14.

Many crowns of violets,

roses and crocuses

…together you set before more

and many scented wreaths

made from blossoms

around your soft throat…

…with pure, sweet oil

…you anointed me,

and on a soft, gentle bed…

you quenched your desire…

…no holy site…

we left uncovered,

no grove…

AND

I have not had one word from her

Frankly I wish I were dead

When she left, she wept

a great deal; she said to me, "This parting must be

endured, Sappho. I go unwillingly."

I said, "Go, and be happy

but remember (you know

well) whom you leave shackled by love

"If you forget me, think

of our gifts to Aphrodite

and all the loveliness that we shared

"all the violet tiaras,

braided rosebuds, dill and

crocus twined around your young neck

"myrrh poured on your head

and on soft mats girls with

all that they most wished for beside them

"while no voices chanted

choruses without ours,

no woodlot bloomed in spring without song..."

Violets emerged as a symbol of lesbian love in the early twentieth century.  Edouard Bourdet’s 1926 play “The Captive” showed a woman sending another woman a bouquet of violets. It caused an uproar and many women began to attend wearing violets in support (and as a way of flagging their queerness).

In Paris, violets were used as a symbol among chic lesbians. Please check out this video from one of my youtube favourites to learn more.

Violets were also used to describe an effeminate or queer man (derogatory).  Abraham Lincoln was  described by historian Carl Sandburg wrote that the US president had, “a streak of lavender” and “spots soft as May violets.” 

Violets are used in some delicate French pastries to create a dreamy floral taste. Pansies² (a form of violet) are probably the most ubiquitous “edible flower”. That you will see strewn across desserts and salads alike this summer.

Lavender

Lavender was associated with an appreciation of art and beauty at the turn of the 20th century. This of course led to SOME people associating it with- non-masculine behavior.

In the 60s, noted homophobe Betty Friedan, the leader of the National Organization for Women, thought that lesbian membership would be a threat to feminism. She called this imagined threat the “lavender menace”. Lesbians, of course, ate that right up and were soon in the streets in t-shirts proudly proclaiming LAVENDER MENACE.

As well, lavender ribbons were worn at the first pride parade that followed the Stonewall riots and used continuously to represent queerness into the HIV/AIDS crisis.

You may have also heard the term “lavender marriage” to describe a marriage of convenience for two queer people. Wherein (often) a gay man and lesbian would marry for cis-het appearances (and protection) and live a gay life in secret on the side.

Now lavender's association with queerness is very cottage-core lesbian or lavender oat milk latte. Lavender can be used in sweet (scones, shortbread) and savoury (herbe de provence) dishes.

Green Carnation

Green carnations are associated with Oscar Wilde, of course. RIP Oscar you would have loved Real Housewives and the entire Bravoverse. Wilde asked the actors and some of his admirers to wear the flowers to the 1892 opening of his play, “Lady Windermere’s Fan.” He did not give a reason why (!). When asked by one of his followers, he replied, “Nothing whatever, but that is just what nobody will guess.” Professor Andrew Lear who hosts Oscar Wilde tours claims that there is no historical proof that Wilde was flagging his sexualities. However, those who know, know, and the flower is now eternally associated with one of Ireland’s greatest queens. 

Elliot Page recently wore a green flower to the MET Gala to honor Wilde.

A green carnation cake would be chic. Some green maraschinos? Cute.

Roses

Roses are of course associated with Eros, the Greco-Roman god of desire, passion and erotic love.³

In Japan roses are associated with gay men. The Japanese word for rose is “bara”. “Bara” is colloquially used to describe queer media. There is an entire genre of manga called “bara” which varies in style and focuses on “gay cis-man things”, though it isn’t necessarily romantic or erotic. Bara is generally by queer men for queer men. And differs from the “yaoi” genre also known as boy’s love which is typically created by women (think BTS fanfic).  

Roses have been a staple of Persian, Middle Eastern, and Indian cooking and desserts. I love rosewater in my tea.

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So much of the relationship between queerness and flowers is centered on an appreciation for beauty that goes beyond what the “norm” would accept. Not in a shallow way but in an awe-stricken way. A form of worship.  Beauty is to be appreciated, and you, my queer family, are beautiful.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Birthday/ small cake orders are currently closed. I’m still accepting some commissions for collaborations and events.

I’m having a bakesale/Pop-up at Librairie Pulp! Come grab a slice this Friday afternoon! I’m going to make a giant strawberry trifle/tiramisu thing. And of course, there will be cake by the slice. 4pm-6pm in Verdun.

EATING 

I’m still on my mostly no grain, low sugar, blah blah tummy healing business. And I’m much better! But the road to recovery is still several months long. A lot of strawberries and melons. The weird mug cake obsession seems to be ending.

READING

Cookbooks. I am slacking on my summer fiction reading. This newsletter by Bronwyn Wyatt on operating a small cake business. It is HARD.

DRINKING 

Iced coffee and affagatos because have you heard I can eat dairy

LISTENING

Brat summer, duh. Also, there’s latin jazz on Tuesday nights at Barbossa. I love the vibe and they have lots of mocktails for $6 and under.

thank you so much for reading <3

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1. But actually, Montreal pride is in August- you can (and should) read all about the Sex Garage raid in the 90s that brought together Montreal's queer community and changed how we celebrate pride).

2. Pansies also fall under the category of violets. In botany all pansies are violas but all violas are not pansies. “Pansy” was the first homophobic slur I heard. I didn’t know how to work this into the rest of the piece.

3. PLEASE read Eros, The Bittersweet if you want to have a yearning, passionate hot girl/ sad girl summer. I swear I am not being paid by Ann Carson. Please notice me Ann Carson.